I spent Thanksgiving surrounded by family. Good food, lots of people, the usual holiday chaos.
And yet somewhere deep inside… I felt completely alone.
Not a single person asked how I was. How my business was going. What I was working on. If there was anything they could do to support me.
It wasn’t malicious, and it wasn’t intentional. People were busy, distracted, caught up in their own conversations and their own lives. I get it. But it still stung.
Because here’s the thing: The people we think should support us aren’t always the ones who do.
And that’s okay. It’s disappointing, sure. But it’s also reality.
Your support system doesn’t have to come from your family. It doesn’t have to look the way you thought it would. It doesn’t have to fit the picture-perfect image you had in your head.
It just has to exist. And sometimes, you have to go out and build it yourself.
The Truth About Support
I think we all grow up assuming that the people closest to us—our family, our oldest friends—will be our biggest cheerleaders. That they will be a built-in support system. They’ll ask the questions, celebrate the wins, and show up when things get hard.
And sometimes, they do. But sometimes, they don’t.
Not because they don’t care. But because they’re living their own lives, dealing with their own stuff, or simply don’t know how to support you in the way you need.
That doesn’t make you less deserving of support. It just means you might have to look for it somewhere else.
Where I’ve Found My People
Here’s what I’ve learned: Your support system can come from anywhere.
Some of my biggest supporters aren’t family. They’re not even people I’ve known my whole life. They’re:
- Women I’ve met in online communities
- People I’ve connected with through networking groups, like Master Networks
- Clients who’ve become friends
- Strangers who’ve sent me a message saying, “I see you, and I’m cheering for you”
These are the people who ask how I’m doing. Who celebrate my wins, check in on me when things are hard. They’re the people who genuinely care about my life and my business.
And honestly? That support means more to me than I can put into words.
3 Ways to Find Your Support System (Even If It Doesn’t Exist Yet)
If you’re feeling like I did on Thanksgiving, here’s what you can do:
1. Join a Community Built Around Shared Experiences
You don’t have to do this alone. There are communities full of people who get it—who understand what you’re going through, who ask the questions, who genuinely want to see you succeed.
Look for groups, networks, or online communities where people are showing up for each other. Places where support isn’t just a nice idea—it’s the whole point.
Where to start: Facebook groups, membership platforms, or networking organizations in your industry or area of interest.
2. Start Showing Up as the Support You’re Looking For
One of the fastest ways to build your support system is to be the person you wish you had. Ask people how they’re doing. Celebrate their wins. Check in when you notice they’re struggling.
When you show up for others, they’ll show up for you. Not everyone, but the right people will.
Where to start: Reach out to one person this week. Ask them how they’re really doing. Celebrate something they’ve accomplished. Be genuine.
3. Get Comfortable Asking for What You Need
This one’s hard, but it’s so important. Sometimes people don’t support us because they don’t know we need it. They don’t know what to ask. They don’t know how to help.
So tell them.
“I’d love it if you asked me about my business sometime.” “I’m really proud of this thing I accomplished—can I share it with you?” “I’m going through a tough season and could use someone to check in on me.”
It’s not needy or too much. It’s honest. And the people who care will appreciate knowing how to show up for you.
Where to start: Identify one person in your life who you think would support you if they knew how. Then tell them what you need.
You Deserve to Be Supported
I don’t care if your family doesn’t get it. I don’t care if your old friends don’t ask. I don’t care if the people you thought would be there… aren’t.
You still deserve to be supported.
You deserve people who ask how you’re doing. Who celebrate your wins. Who check in when you’re struggling. Who genuinely care about your life, your dreams, and what you’re building.
And if you don’t have that right now? You can find it. Build it. You can create the support system you need—even if it doesn’t look the way you thought it would.
You’re Not Alone (Even When It Feels Like It)
If you’re reading this and thinking, “Yeah, I feel that”—you’re not alone.
I’ve been there. I am there. And I’m building something because of it.
The SheSupports Network exists because I wanted a place where women could show up, be seen, be heard, and be supported—no matter where they’re coming from or what their family situation looks like.
A place where someone will always ask, “How are you? How’s your business? What do you need?”
Because we all deserve that. And we don’t have to wait for it to magically appear.
Join the SheSupports Network—a space where women show up for each other, celebrate wins, and navigate the messy middle together.
Because you deserve people who ask. Who care. And who show up for you.
