When I originally wrote this, it was the weekend of July 4th. I was seeing all the posts on social media about parties and barbecues, but no one was talking about what the holiday actually means. One thing I saw missing in a lot of posts back then was a depiction of freedom. The holiday is intended to celebrate when the United States adopted the Declaration of Independence and gained it’s freedom. And when I originally wrote this, I asked myself “Why am I not seeing more posts that show how lucky we are to live in a free society?” The funny thing is, as I rewrite this today, I’m realizing that was the wrong question to ask.

The thing about freedom is that it isn’t really free, is it? As an American, I believe that freedom is the ability to do anything I want, when I want, wherever I want, as long as I’m not hurting someone else. It is the ability to make my own choices about my life, my body, and so much more. And freedom equates to independence, for me. Without freedom, I can’t necessarily have independence.

As a white woman in the United States of America, I have had a lot of privilege growing up in this country. I know this and don’t think it’s fair to others. As a result, my definition of independence is probably very different than someone else’s. I have been able to make my own money, run my businesses (Yes, I’ve had a few!) the way I choose, and have the right to be a dog mom instead of a human mom. But as a woman living in this country, the July 4th holiday no longer symbolizes independence to me.

Sadly, since I wrote this post back in 2017, times have changed. As I sit here and update it, I’m even having a hard time processing the words to type. While I hardly ever get political in my blogs, in my email newsletters, or on my social media accounts, I almost feel like I can’t hide my feelings anymore. A fear of losing my independence doesn’t really seem to cover it. It’s more a feeling of sadness for this country and the people that call it home.

Since I could work in this country, I have, because that was what I thought was my gateway to independence. I paid into the system like I’m supposed to and just floated about, living life. Flash forward, 20+ years later and my eyes are open. Wider than I ever thought they would be. I’m slowly realizing that independence for the majority of those living here is a farce and doesn’t actually exist.

They say we all have the ability to “make it”. First, what does that even mean? And second, who are “they”? If it’s the previous generation from mine, I’m all set with continuing to listen. It’s probably one of the reasons I took a different path in life. I did what everyone said. I should do. Go to college, get a job, find a husband, get married, and then have babies. While I did find a husband, go to college, and get a job (not necessarily in that order), the job wasn’t for me. I was stuck within four walls from 9am to 5pm. Ask me where my independence was then?

As a business owner, I realize I’m creating my own independence. My making my own hours, choosing who I want to work with, and designating each day as a win! So the next time July 4th rolls around, I’m going to celebrate it but for different reasons than most of the country. So if you’re up for it, tell me what you think about independence. I’d love to hear about your version.