It’s Super Bowl Sunday, and everyone’s talking about who’s going to win.
While I don’t really care which team takes home the trophy, I do care about the bigger message behind it all: We all have wins. We all have losses. And both matter.
The thing about life (and business, and relationships, and everything else) is that you can’t have wins without the losses. You can’t win every game or avoid every setback. And you definitely can’t control every outcome. But you can control how you handle those wins and losses. And that’s where the real power is.
My Wins (The Ones That Made Me Feel Unstoppable)
I’ve had some pretty big wins in my life. Moments where I felt proud, strong, and capable. Moments that reminded me I’m more resilient than I give myself credit for.
Making the international club soccer team as a teen. As someone who is only 4’10”, this was huge for me. It meant I was good enough to play with the “big boys”. All that hard work I put into a sport I loved made me feel like I belonged. Like I actually mattered.
Having the gumption to realize corporate couldn’t give me what I needed—and quitting. Fourteen years in a corporate (plus six at a start-up) looked great on paper, but it was slowly draining me. Walking away was terrifying. But was also one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.
Getting through almost three years of medical treatments. This one’s still ongoing, but I’m here. I still have my eyesight, and I’m still able to breathe easily (for the most part). Every day, I show up and fight to survive. That’s a win, even when it doesn’t feel like one.
Those wins shaped me. They taught me I’m stronger than I think. That I can do hard things. Because I went through these, I know I’m capable of more than I give myself credit for.
But you know what? The losses shaped me too.
My Losses (The Ones That Broke Me Open)
I’ve also had some pretty devastating losses. Moments where I felt like I’d failed and was brought to my knees. These were times I wasn’t sure I’d recover from.
There was a really dark moment in my early twenties where I didn’t want to be here anymore. I’m not going to sugarcoat it—it was the lowest point of my life. But I’m still here, and I know it’s for a reason.
Being newly married and having to choose between paying the mortgage or the credit card bill. This is the kind of financial stress that keeps you up at night. I felt like I was drowning, and it made me question everything in my life.
Feeling like I’d failed everyone because I didn’t want to become a mother. Society tells you what you’re supposed to want. And when you realize you don’t want that? It feels like you’ve let everyone down—including yourself.
These losses weren’t easy. But they taught me things the wins never could.
The Power Isn’t in the Win or the Loss—It’s in the Lesson
Here’s what I’ve learned: The scoreboard doesn’t tell the whole story.
Yes, wins feel good. They’re validating. And they’re proof that you’re doing something right.
But the losses? Those teach you things you can’t learn any other way.
They teach you resilience and who you really are when everything falls apart. And they teach you what actually matters—in life and business.
If you’re willing to pause and pay attention, to actually feel what’s happening instead of just pushing through, the lessons that losses will teach you will change everything.
What I Want You to Takeaway
We live in a world that tells us to keep moving. To stay positive no matter what and bounce back as if nothing happened. And sadly, we’re taught to never, ever sit with the hard stuff for too long.
But I’ve learned that you can’t learn the lesson if you don’t pause long enough to acknowledge it.
When you have a win, celebrate it. And I mean really feel it. Let yourself be proud. Try not to minimize the win or move on too quickly.
When you have a loss, sit with it. It’s ok to feel disappointment, frustration, and grief. But we need to know that feeling to learn, so don’t rush to implement a “fix” or pretend it didn’t happen.
Wins and losses matter. Both have something to teach you. And both are part of your story.
What’s Happening For You (Not To You)
This is the mindset shift that will change everything: Things aren’t happening TO you, they’re happening FOR you.
That win? It’s showing you what you’re capable of. That loss? It’s redirecting you toward something better.
The highs teach you what’s possible, and the lows teach you what you’re made of. When you start looking at life this way, everything shifts. So, stop resisting the losses and start asking, “What is this teaching me?”
Go With the Flow (And Actually Experience It)
Life is messy. It’s full of wins and losses, highs and lows, moments of clarity and complete chaos. But that’s okay.
You don’t have to have it all figured out. You just have to show up. Pay attention, feel what you’re feeling, and earn what you’re meant to learn. Because the real win isn’t avoiding the hard stuff. It’s becoming the person who can handle it and grow from it.
Both The Wins and Losses Matter
So if you watched the Super Bowl today (or didn’t—no judgment), remember this:
Both teams showed up. Both teams played their hearts out. Yet one will win, and one will lose. But both will grow and come back stronger.
Whatever you’re going through right now—whether it’s a win, a loss, or somewhere in between—pause. Take time to feel it, understand it, and earn from it.
Because your game isn’t over. And the best is yet to come.
