UPDATED 05/18/2025
So many people have requested this topic! I’ve been getting requests to talk about work/life balance on the podcast. While it surprised me, it also didn’t. I used to think having a balanced life was not possible. Business owners, entrepreneurs, and leaders across the globe have taught me that work/life balance is a myth. But there are ways to take care of yourself. Here’s what I’ve learned and how I now believe you can live a balanced life.
When I think about work, I think about all the time I spend at my computer. The Oxford Dictionary defines work as
an activity involving mental or physical effort done in order to achieve a purpose or result or a task or tasks to be undertaken, something a person or thing has to do
There are a few pieces here that make me look at work a little differently.
First, work is “mental or physical effort”. Anything action where you exert yourself is work. From construction workers to teachers and even researchers have to use energy in their day to day lives.
The second piece is that work is something that someone “has to do”. As an employee, we are required to come in on time every day and do whatever is asked of us by the company we work for. Sometimes it’s enjoyable and other times it’s not. But as an entrepreneur, we are our own boss and either get to do the tasks ourselves or outsource. Which allows for more enjoyment.
But I kept looking into what it means to have a balanced life. I started to see something very peculiar when I looked at the definition of work/life balance. Oxford defines it as
a divide of one’s time between work and activities outside of work or an idea that a fulfilling life outside of work helps improve work performance while reducing stress.
What on earth does the time I spend outside of work have to do with “improve performance”? My first thought is it doesn’t, especially if you are outside all the time—for work or for your play time. But if you intentionally go outside to get rest and rejuvination, then you’ll reduce your stress which in turn helps you be more focused and productive.
Think of the last time you went on vacation. When you travel, even if it’s just a few hours away, you typically do a lot of resting, relaxing, and things that bring you pleasure. When you come return, your first day back to work might be a bit tough but the second day you’re probably ready to work.
I used to think this was a fine way to live. I’d work for a while, go on vacation for a bit, and then come back better than ever. Work was the priority, not the vacation. I lived this way for a very, very long time. Care for myself always came second; work came first. Living like this for years led to serious burnout. I was exhausted, feisty (and not in a good way), judgmental, and jealous. I kept telling myself “work/life balance doesn’t exist”. Now as I look back at the definitions, it’s easy believe there is no such thing. But part of me still believes you can have a balanced life.
To help you conceptualize this, think of a seesaw. Work is on one side and Life is on the other. There is almost never a time when both sides will be 100% even.
There will be seasons of life where work will carry more weight and seasons of life when life will carry more weight. Your time is always devoted to one side or the other and it will almost never be split evenly. Yet I believe there is a way to balance how you spend your time versus where you spend your time.
Your work is your job, it’s your career, and in most cases, it will aways be there. Whether you work for an employer or work for yourself, the work itself will be there. Life doesn’t have that same luxury. Life is everything that happens for you outside of the work being done. It’s when you have time for your friends and family. When you get to go on vacation and have a little fun. What the pandemic has shown us, though, is that life will not always be there for us. I challenge you to think about redefining your work and creating a more balanced life. I can’t define that for you as you as we live different lives but that’s where you get to take control and define it for yourself.
Here’s the question I want you to ask yourself: Do you look at things you have to do outside of work as work?
Cooking and cleaning, shopping for your household, events to attend, etc. If you don’t see these things as work, then deep inside, I bet you think work/life balance is a possibility. That burnout I mentioned before is what led to make some changes. I started to practice lots of self-care and personal development. I explored who I was and what I really wanted out of life. Looking back, I am grateful I had that experience because it led down the path I’ve lived. From corporate to life coaching and now a digital operations specialist. Each step I took helped me grow, move the needle forward, and learn how to live the balanced life I was dreaming of. Here’s what I did and what I want you to do to help you have more life in your life.
How to Live a Balanced Life
- Set Boundaries – When you set boundaries, you put imaginary lines between you and the things you don’t want to do. When I was in corporate, I set a boundary that said I would never miss my train to go home. I promised myself I would leave at a set time. If I stayed even just five minutes late, I would be home extra late and not be able to enjoy my time with my husband and my pups.
- Say No More – I started to say that one word sentence a lot more. If I was invited for a drink after work, I would pass because I would miss out on time at home. If I was asked to do a special project at work, I would evaluate it before responding. Start saying no more and you’ll find your true priorities come to light.
- Organize Your Schedule – Before burnout, I was trying to cram everything into one day. On the weekends, I would do all the laundry, all the dishes, all the housework… you get the idea. It was too much! I would end up spending eight hours working around the house without any of it being fun. I limited the amount of things I would do each day in order to add in some more free time.
- Define your Priorities in Life – Notice I didn’t say work. I don’t want you to even think about work when you do this part. What do you want out of life? What do you want for you and your family? Your children? Your relationships? Think about all of it, as it stands today, and what your ideal life should be like. You have the liberty to dream and take actionn so those dreams can become realities.
Remember, work is almost always going to be around. There will almost always be something for you to do. You’re life isn’t so privileged. So enjoy it while you can, friends.
